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What is Love?

When I say I am over love my friends think I am being dramatic.


In a way, I guess I am, but let me explain why I say it.


When I was younger I had this idea about love. It was grand, and full of color. It was the prince and the princess living the happy ever after I saw in the movies. However, as I grew that idea began to change. First, as I explored myself, my wants began to change. I was no longer the 5 year old girl that wanted to get married in a castle. I was also not sure I wanted the prince. You see as a child love was a fairytale, now as a young adult love is different.

Yes love is still beautiful and colorful, but it's also work. It's about choice, it's about sacrifice.


Second, I realized what my needs actually were. For a long time I thought I needed love to be OK. I thought the mark of successful entering adulthood was being in a loving relationship. Then one day I realized love and relationships are not the same thing. For most of my life I had been conflating these two concepts. I have been using the terms interchangeably. That had been my mistake. A mistake I realize I sometimes still do.


What I mean is, when I told my friends I was over love what I meant was, I am over relationships. That is to say, I am in a point of my life when relationship are not my goal or my focus. If I fall in love and start a relationship tomorrow that's great. But, I will be just as happy if my next relationship is when I'm 40 or never.


There are still traumas I have to deal with before I can share myself with someone else, and that is perfectly fine.


When I was a child love was about a romantic relationship, now love just is. I am learning to love myself more every day, and that love is enough for me right now.


I also realized love is different for everyone.


And so my fellow travelers on this road we call life; I challenge you to really think about what love means to you. Think about all the different types, think about what love you need. Remember that love like life is a journey.


PS. I picture from when I was in Paris, the city of love.





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